Great English

Does anybody read this anymore???

2007-07-01T19:29:00.000-07:00

I don't know if anybody reads this so i'm going to conduct a small "E-xperiment". No different than "E-mail", or even "E-cards" it's a term in which the word after the hyphen is just an internet version, represented by the "E".

So now that that's understood i'll explain the experiment...

First I will write an introduction to the E-xperiment, and E-xplain what an E-xperiment is (above). Secondly i will E-xplain the E-xperiment (below).

The E-xperiment will go like this. This post will be broadcasted via internet worldwide for anyone to see, E-xluding Arabs and North Africans (but including E-thiopians), because they dont have computers or electricity in the deserts.

Eventually somebody might read this, maybe tomorrow, maybe 100 years in the future.

And when they do, I E-xpect them to tell me about it, concluding my E-xperiment.

The end

The Holy Folk

2007-04-09T20:56:00.000-07:00

The Holy Folk is a band that is composed of one of our contributors, Alex A. and our good friend Landon Albright.

"THF borrowed its name from an old children's hymn when the project started as a couple of pseudo-noise songs written with apocalyptic connotations. "

They just put a video up and of course theres a myspace, links below.

Video
Myspace

New Stuff

2007-04-09T20:51:00.000-07:00

I finally made a couple of deviations for my deviant spot. Check out the whole gallery at:
Alexbot

"motorcycle dan"

"alexbot"

Im looking to do some small projects like small time cover art if anyone is interested. Thank you much. contact me

Brian Posehn - Metal by Numbers

2007-03-29T12:07:00.000-07:00

Brian Posehn composes his own metal music video, with lots of lulz for results.

"Now heres the gay part, it has melody"

Link: Metal By Numbers

eye me mine

2007-03-21T10:31:00.000-07:00

so there's nothing like hitting your own eye on the corner of your own car door to make you feel like a complete fuckhead.

some excuciating pain, some nasty eye juice, and a trip to the ER later, there's nothing wrong with me and i should recover quite nicely.

i REALLY wanted an eyepatch though, but my doctor was freaking me out. he was looking through some....eye thingy checking my pupils with all the lights off in the room, whispering with his mouth right by my ear, "you have the biggest pupils i've ever seen!"

whatever.

Read a book

2007-03-02T06:54:00.000-08:00

Koushun Takami's action packed thriller is based on the following things:

1.) A group of junior high school students

2.) A deserted island

3.) An authoritarian program which provides them with weapons

4.) The rule that they have to kill each other

5.) Only one person can survive

just fucking order it off amazon or check borders...now.

Quick Cartoon.

2007-02-28T13:44:00.000-08:00

I don't know where this is from. i'm not taking credit for it. i just thought it was clever.

Daytrotter

2007-02-22T08:42:00.000-08:00

With all the skeevy mp3 blog sites (mostly illegal) out there its a rarity to come across great sites like Pandora and Daytrotter. It's also a delicacy to listen to free recordings that dont sound like they were recorded on a yak bak. Daytrotter was inspired by John Peel and is the baby of Sean Moeller and Patrick Stolley. They launched the site to exhibit live recodings of popular indie bands without the sacrifice of recording quality and $.99 out of your wallet. They feature popular indie bands such as Of Montreal and the French Kicks.

from source: Daytrotter’s recordings are known for their warm, fluid sound, the result of the studio’s candy shop of vintage gear, including a Rhodes piano, a Lowrey tube organ, and a dozen Spectra Sonic preamps. “We record straight to quarter-inch tape,” Moeller says. “There are no overdubs. No ProTools. What you hear on the site is exactly what happened that day.”

So just visit: Daytrotter

Source: Wired Magazine

Why I Like Bouncing Souls

2007-02-20T15:13:00.000-08:00

* 45 degree days
* sun
* 40 oz.
* boredom
* hometown highways
* a dependable car almost as old as me
* extra long cigarettes
* reminders of when i was 15

Les Rallizes Denudes

2007-02-10T22:56:00.000-08:00

Japan has always played host to bands that have found a much larger following outside their own country then in their own, and the same holds true for Les Rallizes Denudes, a cult psychedelic group from Osaka.

The band relies heavily on distorted guitar and occasionally mysterious japanese lyrics. Well of course they're mysterious, they're Japanese.

Once you get to know a little more about the band, the more intriguing they become. In their original form in 1967, they were strongly connected with far left wing politics, and reguraly played at protest rallies, apparently at one point even overtaking a junior high school's yard and playing loud music while handing out fliers promoting Che Guevera, Lenin, and Nietzsche. It is also thought that lead guitarist/vocalist Mizutani Takashi had connections with 1970 hijacking of an airliner from Japan to North Korea by the Japanese Red Army.

More importantly though, LRD makes a powerful statement with its music. Its loud and distorted sound not only draws you in, but keeps you interested with its drifting sound.

They are often compared the The Velvet Underground, for reasons I can't seem to figure out.

Anyways, here are some downloads, because you can't go to the record store and buy any of thier stuff, and you'd have a pretty tough time finding it on ebay for cheap too.

Mizutani:
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=PC2ADRS5

S.O.S.

2007-02-08T10:28:00.000-08:00

Somebody please help me I am being held against my will in Edgerton Wisconsin and have been here for about a month so far. I keep hearing strange noises about "fucking my pussy", or "slapping that ass real rough" coming from the vents in my bathroom.
Milwaukee Black Land Lady X goes at it on an average of maybe 4 times a week on the couch at the bottom of my stairs with only a thin wooden door to muffle her screams and hoots! Who knows what's going on down there!
Evidence gathered from me and Dr. Chris Hillis suggests that it's anything from her Ron Jeremy Cheech Marin look alike husband and his 10 inch dong "fucking that pussy harder than shit" while somebody pays to watch (don't laugh, it's true) to my 4'5'' 60 year old neighbor who lives with her 90 year old mom getting dildo'd by Milwaukee Black Land Lady X and her fat friend who drives the rape van.
I first became aware of Milwaukee Black Land Lady X's sexual addiction at my housewarming party when she offered Eddie Roemer a blow job, but only after he "got up in this shit", pointing to her vagina.
So please come over and if you cant take me away at least bring me whiskey or a fucking DVD player that works.

Check It

2007-02-05T07:46:00.000-08:00

Bored? An inspired find due to the latest ATHF calamity.

visit: The Hoax Devices Catalogue

"Banana Phone
This inconspicuous mobile device is actually a sinister weapon of mass destruction disguised as a ordinary cellular phone that you might see anyone on the street talking on. Or in the grocery store, or a not-too-fancy restaurant. However, beneath it's harmless exterior lies something far more Evil. Yes, with a capital "E." When you punch in the key combination 84370089#5672**6625303#0986562*94762#03487255558283645930298465210029489927346*#*##* this will instantly turn every person within a 4 mile radius who is using a cellular phone into a banana. A large, slightly ripe one, but a banana none the less. You might ask yourself how something like this is possible, and that would be a damn good question. Luckily there are scientists and stuff. "

Source: www.engadget.com

A Weekend In The Shitty

2007-02-04T11:56:00.000-08:00

Alright, alright, so the title of this post is a little uncalled for, but it was just too easy. Anyhow, for those of you who are cool enough to not know what I'm talking about, British indie-rockers Bloc Party have just released a new album entitled "A Weekend In The City".

In comparison to their 2005 debut album, "Silent Alarm", which failed to top the U.S. charts, I would say this one is.....better. Or more mature sounding, at least. Even though I have serious doubts about any chart-smashing #1 hits from the band anytime soon, it's a relatively enjoyable album with high energy indie songs like "Hunting For Witches" which follow in the wake of their early single "Banquet".

on a scale of 0-10, I'm giving this album a 6.

ATHF PWNS BOSTON

2007-02-02T08:01:00.000-08:00

Boston authorities are quite frankly...retarded. The cartoon show Aqua Teen Hunger Force recently had an ad campaign in which LED boards were placed around various cities displaying a picture of a mooninite flippping the bird. Of the 10 cities the devices were placed in, Boston was the only city that deemed them a threat. The boards were placed around Boston by two men hired by Turner broadcasting. The men have now been charged with disorderly conduct and something called "placing a hoax device in a way that results in panc." The event already has its own wikipedia page: ATHF PWNS BOSTON

my god....

Yes.

2007-02-01T22:57:00.000-08:00

This post is dedicated to all those Dimmu cover bands from the summer of '06 out there, live long and prosper.

Featured Artist: midgetparts

2007-01-30T19:29:00.000-08:00

WARNING: I am about to fully misrepresent our new friend Allan. We had a stimulating conversation via the internet, and in my infinite wisdom I decided it would be smart to not remember the simple task of saving it. I copied the things we said that i could remember verbatim, however it's not much, and apologize profusely to Allan (who is a totally rad guy even though you'd never guess it from this interview), and everyone else who thinks this sucks.
Please check out the artwork as well as the links below, and enjoy the eye candy.

Name:Allan Bjornaa
Age:31
Current residence: Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario, Canada

How long have you been doing your artwork?
About 4 years....professionally(as my job) about 5 months

So what do you do for a living?
I am an artist. Plus i make t-shirts

Are you going to have any t-shirts on Midget Parts?
Yeah, next week. I’ve got a couple designs.

Full Gallery: http://midgetparts.deviantart.com/

"air"

see full work at: http://midgetparts.deviantart.com/

"fashion statement"

see full work at: http://midgetparts.deviantart.com/

"let's go bombing"

see full work at: http://midgetparts.deviantart.com/

"soccer mom"
see full work at: http://midgetparts.deviantart.com/

If you've enjoyed this stuff as much as we have...support him. Below are a couple of sites that can help you do that. Check it out.

http://midgetparts.blogspot.com/

http://cgi.ebay.ca/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300074592302

KKKravitz

2007-01-29T16:12:00.000-08:00

Mild form of slavery? Probably.
Cheap tube socks? You bet!
If the US government has done their job, then you think that humans are inherently tolerant people that are sometimes brainwashed by general society into racism. Wrong. Its natural to single out people that differ from us and force them to use separate bathrooms, drink from water fountains laced with LSD, and enslave the general populace to harvest cotton to be sold to the royalty in Europe.

In all reality, we're all a little racist at heart. Some more than others. Even in seemingly politically correct Hollywood, where, to the surprise of the outside world who sees Hollywood as a safe-haven for liberal ideals, racism runs rampant. Hollywood is an ocean of racist slander and intolerance. Today i'll point one of the worst lies ever to disgrace our democratic free soil: Lenny Kravitz.

Lenny Kravitz

Those sandals aren't a fashion statement.
They're all he came to America with.
They say Kravitz is jewish and black, but in reality jews and blacks CANNOT reproduce together, it is biologically impossible. Jews are actually a super race, who figured out how to disallow their genes to combine with those of certain other races, including blacks, Koreans, and Australians. This way their superior genes can carry on long into the future without fear of tainted children.
Kravitz himself was a creation of the music industry to perpetuate the
false belief jews and blacks can intermingle. In fact, Kravitz is a Russian immigrant painted black. A new, robotic voice box was inserted to his larynx to imitate the voice of a suave New Yorker that could make any woman who hadn't been sterilized by the local nuclear power plant melt.
How do I know all this? You can also look at Kravitz's lyrics, which hint at his Russian tendencies. See for yourself.

She was only seventeen
Disgusting, Kravitz.
And if you are ready He always is ready for you
Homosexuality is rampant in Russia. Even more disgusting.
He's spreading funk throughout the nations
FUNK is code for bootleg Russian vodka.

If you still aren't convinced he's Russian, buy an album by him. On the last page of each booklet included with the CD, there is a photo of Stalin, Kravitz photo-shopped next to him, arm in arm.
In communist Russia as a young man, Kravitz was the icon used by the communist regime to reinforce separationist ideas, and prove the superiority Russia had over other, so called "free" nations. Ironically enough, Kravitz was the reason the USSR collapsed.
The year was 1989. Kravitz was a young, fresh out of Moscow School of Standardized Russian Rock. He was set to perform for Russian leader Mikhail Gorbachev. As he began to play is style of generic rock and roll everyone could relate too, a bomb went off in the back of the arena. A sympathizer to one of Kravitz's competing artists, Kurt Cobain, had blown himself up over the fact Kravitz had been chosen over him to perform. This led to a chain of events that eventually led to the collapse of the Soviet Union. Don't believe all that shit about Reagan negotiating with Gorbachev. It was essentially a rock and roll revolution.
Long story short, Virgin Records picked up Kravitz off the streets of St. Petersburg and began the transformation. The US government paid Virgin to turn him into an award winning Jewish-African American rocker. It worked.
And so you have it. Lenny Kravitz: Communist Sympathizer.

Photo Show

2007-01-25T08:20:00.000-08:00

Ok any and all Chicago residents should attend my friends opening at the Dialog Cafe on Feb 9th at 7pm. It should be cool.
The address is 6333 N. Clark (at Devon)

Lack of updates

2007-01-25T07:41:00.000-08:00

Well Great English fans...all 5 or so of you, bad news. My graphics card has recently been acting up (blue dots on screen, sure sign of video card failure) and it finally took a shit on me and completely failed. My computer is out of commision so i will be lacking on updates, especially on the upcoming website. Im very dissapointed but im hoping the other contributors get their asses in gear (Tom, Alex, Trevor) and pick up the slack. So unless any of you want to buy me an old AGP graphics card (or prefrebly give me 1000 dollars to build a new computer), farewell for now...ill update as much as possible between my classes. I leave you with this:

Peace and Love

-Alex

Hard Times For A Young, Straight Man In A Soap Store.

2007-01-21T11:51:00.000-08:00

Truth be told, if you weren't already aware, I am currently employed buy a small store inside our local mall. This store sells a large assortment of soaps, lotions, creams, shampoos and conditioners, bubble baths, lip balms, loofas.......oh God, the loofas......

You get the idea. At any rate, working there sucks a really big, scabie infested asscrack. Don't get me wrong, it's a nice place. My managers are generally nice people, who don't mind if I'm a couple minutes late here and there, or if I completely fuck something up out on the floor...you know how it is, half of you people out there probably have some kind of retail experience under your belt.

Shit, I just realized i could basically drone on and on about this, but nobody has the patience to read that long of a story written by yours truly. So I'm going to make a short, accurate list of the reasons why I hate working at my job:

1.) It's a women's store. NOT a chick store. Some people think I'm lucky because I can talk to hot young babes and rub test lotions on their hands. 90% of the women that come into that store are over the age of 35. And ugly.

2.) Working at this store most likely leads many people to believe that I am gay. But in all honesty, people have thought I was gay since like 7th grade, so this really isn't any big thing.

3.) I am the only male employed at this store. Not really a big deal either, but sometimes it's overwhelming.

4.) The one thing that truly pisses me off to no end, is that any time my back is turned to a customer while I'm stocking a shelf, they get my attention by saying something along the lines of "Excuse me, miss..." DAMNIT. I'm probably going to punch the next man or woman that mistakes me for a vagina-laden being just because I work in a store that smells like one.

In the words of Charlie Brown, good grief.

Ya Heard.

2007-01-16T17:20:00.000-08:00

This could very well be the dawn of a new era for Great English; a fantastic voyage that could only be the product of immense boredom and the mediocre life that I lead. Truth be told I'm not a good writer. Or artist. Or musician, etc. Will it stop me? I think not.

mad props to Johnny Depp.

Featured Artist: Armss

2007-01-16T15:02:00.000-08:00

Great English represents. Let us know who you want to see featured.

Whenever we get the chance, we feature an Artist. Usually a Q&A will accompany the artwork that is shown as well as some other information. You can submit artist content/information to one of the GE Admins and they might be featured here.

Featured Artist: Armss
Full Gallery: http://armss.deviantart.com/

"scandals"

See full work at http://armss.deviantart.com/

Q&A

Where are you from, what’s your name and how old are you?
St. Petersburg, FL, Kevin Carney, 16.

How long have you been creating art?
Umm…almost three years.

Your favorite piece?
Mine…like of mine?

Yeah, I mean plenty of your stuff gets me sexually aroused...what gets you going?
Haha, umm “we can fix it”

Awesome, ill give you a good one... if you had the chance would you kill baby Hussein?
Yes, with no doubt.

Are collages your main thing in art...do you prefer making anything else?
I like digital photo manipulation but it’s played out and I also like typography and I do some stencil work.

What else are you up to when you're not bustin’ out the collages and shit?
Parties, golf, surfing and the occasional homework assignment.

What about your mom? Are you still pissing her the fuck off?
True, I lived in 3 different houses last school year, haha.

Rad, that’s exactly what we needed. Anything else you have to say?
---

"zzzzzzzzz"

See full work at http://armss.deviantart.com/

"stuck in the middle"

See full work at http://armss.deviantart.com/

Welcome to Great English

2007-01-16T11:54:00.000-08:00

This is the official Great English blog site. Since I am too lazy to produce a web page as of now (classes started again) this is the official GEHQ. Great English is an idea that was generated by myself and a group of friends in the town of Evansville, WI. The idea pretty much lost momentum right away because we all have temporary mindsets. I want to start GE back up again and god damnit everyone better commit to this. The Great English blog will be all about random posts, drawings and any other shit myself or my friends feel like putting on here. Great English as of now has 3 main contributers: Alex A. Tom F. and Alex S. Come here if you like to enjoy yourself. Visit the GE myspace at : www.myspace.com/greatenglish. Until next time...thanks, -GEAS.